Physical Immortality Means ending Duality

Being dual, split, of two minds means the flesh is in a state of unrest. Thinking this then that. Liking yourself one minute, disliking something about yourself the next. Fulminating over what he or she did or said. Wondering how to protect yourself next time. How will you do it differently next time to make sure you've got the upper hand, the control? Tossing and turning in bed at night, or during the day, at work, fully clothed with that smile plastered to your face.
Who's right and who's wrong in every situation and how do I convince myself that I'm right, every time?

Yesterday, I ended all that for myself. Being physically immortal means that I am able to receive a touch, a comment, a deep conversation from another person who has noticed something about myself that is no longer complimentary to my staying alive forever. Being open to that touch, that feeling and expression to me from another person allows my body to expand. It's like I feel the actual skin spread out, giving me more room to live, to move, to feel and be felt. Dimitri, one of the men who are part of my immortal life, spoke to me a few weeks back about wanting me to stop rejecting myself. He told me I had been told this many times, and he felt it was time that I actually did something about it. It's serious, he said. This is the kind of thing that kills people and he felt, I could die along with this habit I had. I felt his concern and I thanked him. I felt there was something in it but it wasn't until yesterday, driving around, and finally hearing my mind and what I was doing to myself with the automatic thinking that goes on, that I shouted "NO!" As soon as I stopped the angry, self defeating, self-deprecating monologue, I felt lighter, a sense of relief. That monologue disappeared and that's when I saw that it was merely a habit. A way of life I had carried with me from the day I was able to self-reflect, whenever that age was for me. Questioning everything said to me, wondering if praise was real, if criticism would ever end, if I was going to become 'right' some day, instead of always 'wrong'.
Well now, I am taking what Bernie said at our last event, about finally valuing herself, seeing how valuable she really is, the impact she has on others, taking that in and accepting it, living it, having a rest with herself. It's the same for all of us. We must know our value, and I am experiencing mine now.

My intention is to outlive death and all its slimey, underhanded ways. I do this with you. You speak to me and wake me up. You adore me. You make changes you need to make. You stop me in my tracks and lighten up the world with how simple living really is. I'm so happy tonight. I have ended duality and I can relax and feel a completeness I have never felt before.

We've been speaking about how important it is to fuse together, to feel one another as our selves. To have such an awareness of one another and a passion for each other. To trust and be relaxed and be there when the crucial times are calling. Well, I feel this ending of duality has paved my way to fusion with all of you. The more the word is spoken, the more organically we respond and change begins to reformulate our bodies, reactions, words, sense of each other. Now that I am whole and not split, I am free to move towards and into you, to give myself in ways I never have, to show you the way through the valley of death, not just expect you to show me.

What a supreme life. What a classy, interesting, smart, attractive, warm, welcoming, endlessly entertaining body of people we are.